It has been some time since I have posted. Since then, I have gone through three jobs – four if you count an at home contract position while I was searching for another.
Since then I have also been studying more on Psychopathy, Narcissism, and other Cluster B Personality Disorders.
I have also learned that my mother was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. After over a decade of psychotherapy, she finally found out her condition. It has been eating away at her for years…wanting to know. Over the past five or six years she has been using Risperidone and Paxil for her condition, though I do not know, given her recent diagnosis, if her prescriptions have been changed. Given that Cluster B personality disorders are not (yet) curable and seem to only be eased by frequent therapy, it is possible that she isn’t on anything.
Anyway, my family life has been utter shit. I cannot seem to kick alcohol to the curb, and if I don’t have a can of dipping tobacco around I get frustrated. My wife is suffering for it. I change whenever I drink. It may seem cliche, but when I drink I turn into Edward Hyde. My impulse control is rather low even when I’m sober, but when I drink it is reduced to pretty much null. I laugh sometimes at the thought that I patching plaster makes up the majority of my walls than the original Sheetrock. I simply cannot control myself.
Anyway. My older kids are as devious as ever, and my two youngest cannot seem to break their infatuation with their mother. She spoils them rotten, giving into most of their desires. I have no patience for it. I love them, but I hate to see someone spoiled. They either want to eat, drink, or be held all the time. It is a blessing when they actually decide to watch a movie or play with their toys, leaving me and their mother to do housework or just sit and read.
Well, that is all I have to update you on for now. I will post more frequently from now on.